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A New Kind of Wedding Vow

I posted my wedding vows on Facebook last week, and the post literally went viral. I've never had so many people comment on or share a post.

I get what it touched in people was the possibility that you don't have to give yourself up to include someone in your life.

My vows were actually not written for my husband. I wrote them for me.

What do I have to promise myself to make the choice to get married peaceful in my world? How can I use everything I have learned to create something truly different? What would it take to create this relationship every single day?

I'd like to share them with you. May they give you something else to wonder about in whatever relationships you may be creating in your life daily:



  • I promise to never give up my dreams for you, but instead to include you in them.

  • I promise to never ask you to make me your life, but I will joyfully join you in the parts of your life I am invited to.

  • I promise to ask you questions rather than assuming I know who you are or what you need from me.

  • I promise to look to what I am grateful for every day, and to also be aware of what is not working so that we can change it.

  • I promise to support you and to cheer you on in whatever it is you need to do to create the world you desire to live in.

  • And I promise I will work to put into play everything I have learned about honor, trust, allowance, vulnerability and gratitude to create with you an intimacy and in turn a marriage we can feel both whole and free within.

What else is possible for relationship on this planet?

Will you join me in asking?

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