It's Not Your Choice If Someone is Inspired of Feels Terrible
I remember sitting on the couch next to my roommate one late October nearly six years ago. We were both working. As usual :) She was going over her finances and was $27,000 into her overdraft. To me that was a horrifying proposition.
"What would it take to be out of my overdraft by Christmas?" she asked cheerfully.
"What!?" I couldn't really believe the question.
$27,000 was about what I created in 6 months, if I was lucky. I couldn't imagine being buried by that much debt, but I definitely couldn't imagine changing it in 2 months. I knew she had an international trip coming up and I also knew how much she splurged around Christmas. To declare in front of my that she could create and EXTRA $27,000 on top of all that, well, honestly, it felt mean.
Didn't she know how hard it was for me to create money?
Couldn't she be a little more sensitive on that topic rather than boasting about how much she was paid?
If you are cheering for me at this point in the story and want my friend to stop being mean... let's wait a minute for that.
If you are thinking, "well that's a weird reaction," I'd have to agree. You are correct. You are 800 million percent correct. It IS a weird reaction. Or at least the reaction of a victim and a reaction that will never create more.
The things is, she hadn't even said she could do it. She had literally just asked question. (How dare she ask a question that big! LOL).
Luckily I have these fun tools called Access where I actually catch myself most of the time when I'm being insane. And this feeling of being hurt by what she was capable of creating caught my attention.
Why was I not going "WOW! You can do that!?" What would it take for ME to do that? What do you know about money that I could be more of? What would it take for me to have that much ease creating money?
In that moment, I was choosing to let what she could create make me feel bad about myself. That's crazy! How much did I love that particular story of being a victim when it comes to money? A lot! And yet, I chose to let go of much of it that very day.
Here's the thing...
It is not up to you how someone responds when you create something great.
It wasn't up to my roommate if I chose to be hurt or to be inspired. It is not up to me when someone walks into one of my houses if they say "I'll have some of this!" or "what is wrong with me that I haven't created more."
We don't get to choose that.
But do you know what you DO get to choose?
You get to choose what YOU create. You get to choose what you be.
And if you choose to create a life that can inspire others to choose more, they will not all choose to be inspired.
But some may.
So are you?
Are you willing to create a life that inspires others to create more? And then to leave them the choice to respond however it is they desire to respond?
That's the tricky bit. And it's also where all the freedom waits.