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Pragmatic Relationships: Doing What Works

Have you ever been in a relationship that really just didn't work?

In my years of trauma and drama (aka my early 20's) I spent 3 years with a man who I basically didn't like and who seemed to find joy in riling me up to fight (which if you know me at all, is not exactly in my nature).  

When I look back on those not so bright years, what is the most glaringly obvious to me, was that not only did we not work, we kept doing the same things that did not work over and over.  It was like stupidity on steroids.  

Oh, but I loved him!!! Blah blah blah blah

The first time I was introduced to the concept of a pragmatic relationship my jaw dropped.  What about the fairy tale?  Where is the romance in having a clear deal with a person you love?

I'll tell you where the fairy tale is... your life gets to be easy! And you can actually start creating things like intimacy, joy, contribution instead of upset and drama and chaos. 

What would it be like to stop expecting people to deliver things they have no desire to deliver?  What would it take to get clear on exactly what someone is and is not willing to be?  

What could you be or do different that might create the results in relationship you say you really want?

Is now the time for a little more ease?